Friday, July 11, 2014


 "A two-year old is kind of like having a blender, but you don't have a top for it."
Jerry Seinfeld

When my daughter turned two I jumped for joy.  Milestones are like parent drugs, we need them, we love them, and we can't get enough.  Our celebration included cupcakes, she had 1 I had 11 (it's my "birth “day too!!), and Doc McStuffins reruns.

When you meet the parents of other two year olds there's a wide eyed, weary bonding thing that happens.  You understand the sleep deprivation, the mini tantrums, and the "please God get down from there before you break something!!!" stage of toddler life.  We know it will pass; soon they will be teenagers who sleep late and think everything we do is annoying.  Thinking fondly of the revenge I'll get when the time comes here are 10 things I'm planning to do when my daughter becomes a teenager:

I'm going to wake her up in the middle of the night and ask for coffee.

I'm going to wake her up on Saturdays at 4:45am and ask for coffee.

I'm going to ask her for cookies, and when she says she doesn't have any cookies, ask her again.

I'm going to make her watch the same episode of Grey's anatomy over and over again; you know the one when George died?

I'm going to teach her how to cook, have her make dinner, take one bite then spit it out and ask for cookies.

I'm going to make her read me my favorite bed time story over and over. Who doesn't like War and Peace?

I'm going to wake her up at 3am, and make her watch TV Land till I fall asleep in her lap. Oh but first I'll want cookies.

I'm going to go shopping with her, pull down all the clothes on hangers while dancing to Beyonce classics in the aisles.

I'm going to have her make me breakfast, then smear oatmeal all over the table while laughing hysterically.

Finally, I'm going to climb into her bed while she sleeps, curl into a ball, rest my foot on her face, and sleep like a baby.

I can't wait.


  1. This list made me laugh out loud! I forgot how I came across your blog... Instagram, maybe? Anyway, I can't wait to catch up on your archives and see what else you have to come! Have a great day!

    1. Thank you so much! Glad I could make you laugh :)

  2. Omg this was hysterical.. I love it... I can relate to all and want to do the same to both my kids.



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